Explosions Are Friends
by IEvolution2330I
Summary: At age five Naruto receives a book from the hokage on how to make exploding tags and since birth Naruto has always like explosions, so let's jump in and find out what happens when an Arsonist Naruto lives his life blowing S*it up, he also manages to garner the attention of a certain bun haired girl. Rating M because my stories naturally have lot's of swearing involved.
1. Chapter 1:Naruto Likes Explosions

**Explosions Are Friends, Well Naruto Uzumaki Thinks So **

"I'm speaking"- Speech  
**"Demon's speaking, justu names"  
**_"I'm thinking"- thinking  
__**"I'm a thinking demon, i'm thinking my justu"- Demon thoughts and justu's being thought of.**_

**Chapter 1: Prolouge/Naruto Likes Explosions**

_Ever since the defeat of the dreaded Kyuubi 5 years ago, a young boy named Naruto Uzumaki received beatings of many kinds from the villagers of the still recovering Hidden Leaf Village or Konoha, now many of you are wondering why?_

_Well that answer is forbidden to be told but I'm sure I can make an exception for you, you see young Naruto was the container of the dreaded Kyuubi, now all of you are going "excuse me, I'm seem to recall you said the dreaded Kyuubi was defeated, how can Naruto be the container?". And that question has a simple answer, you see The Fourth Hokage, Minato Namikaze couldn't defeat the Kyuubi as you see it is a demon lord and demon lords cannot be simply defeated by mortals, instead The Fourth Hokage sealed away the evil monstrosity inside a newly born Naruto Uzumaki on October 10._

_Now, Minato wasn't a cruel man who simply felt no remorse for what he had to do, he regretted it till the moment he died... which wasn't very long after the sealing as you see, to seal a demon lord you must summon the shinigami (Deathgod) to commence the sealing and in return the Shinigami must take said summoners soul as payment._

_Now I'm probably boring you to death with all this driveling information so I shall skip to the point of explanation needed for why young Naruto always received beatings, well it's quite simple really, the villagers of Konoha beat Naruto because they are enraged at the Kyuubi and the Kyuubi was sealed in Naruto, so they can't take their rage out on Kyuubi, but Naruto is the container of the Kyuubi and the villagers hate the Kyuubi and since the villagers hate the Kyuubi... ahem I seem to be rambling, anyway you can see the predicament Naruto finds himself in._

_In reality you can understands the villagers pain, the Kyuubi killed hundreds of ninja's and villagers of Konoha, and those murdered people had families, families who despised the Kyuubi for what it did and they beat Naruto for revenge which is actually quite stupid._

_So to summarize, Naruto has one of the biggest burdens in five nations, Kyuubi's a bastard, the villagers of Konoha are retards... oh and Naruto loves explosions._

_No time to explain, time to pass the story onto Naruto._

_**THIS IS A LINE**_

_Naruto Uzumaki was five years old and he loved few things, he loved orange and black, he loved Old Man Hokage or Jiji, he loved Ramen and the Ramen restaurants owners Techu and his daughter Ayame, and he also loved explosions and not just watching them but actually making and causing them, now how Naruto came into loving explosions nobody knows or really cares, especially not Naruto._

_Speaking of our little jinchuriki we find him sitting in his bed at the local orphanage he lives at, did I mention he was an orphan, it's pretty important information... whatever. _

**THIS IS A LINE**

"_Wow, I can't believe Jiji gave me this book about things that go boom, it's so cool"_thought the little blonde buy on his bed, it's true the Hokage did give Naruto a book about explosives and even told him about explosive tags, now Naruto only being an infant had practically no flecking idea what Jiji was babbling on about half the time, the only things that Naruto understood was that explosive tag's cause big booms and that is all that mattered to young Naruto.

So what if he couldn't understand the fact that if a five year old tries to create an explosive tag without even being able to read the kanji he's writing it could, key word being **could** backfire horribly, if these so called "explosive tag's" can cause explosions it can cause explosions on the mean villagers that hurt him for no apparent reason, besides the fact that he recently managed to cause one off the sewer pipes to blow up and Naruto didn't even have a clue on how he did it.

Naruto worked tirelessly which him being five meant about one hour after 7.00pm then he fell asleep with a smile on his face.

He managed to construct an actual exploding tag with no experience in writing Kanji or constructing a seal but he actually did it.

And on that night Konoha was in for one hell of a shock because Naruto Uzumaki un-officially declared himself the DEMOLITION EXPERT, there was just one small problem.

Naruto didn't have a clue what demolition and expert meant.

**This is a line**

CUT THAT'S A WRAP.

So this chapter is really short, and quite frankly i'm dissapointed in myself but this prologue Is hopefully the start of a new story if people like it.

This is Ievolution360I B.I.T.C.H.E.S  
Signing off.


	2. Chapter 2: Ahem!

**Explosions Are Friends, Well Naruto Uzumaki Thinks So **

"I'm speaking"- Speech  
**"Demon's speaking, justu names"  
**_"I'm thinking"- thinking  
__**"I'm a thinking demon, i'm thinking my justu"- Demon thoughts and justu's being thought of.**_

_**By the way, I am British, so I am using the British spellings.**_

**Chapter 1: Ahem... Don't Know Where He Learned That**

**Previously On Explosions Are Friends:**

_Ah! Welcome back, I knew you would return, now as you may or may not know Naruto Uzumaki is the jinchuriki of the nine-tailed demon fox lord... or Kyuubi for short and has been living on Mother-Nature's Earth for five years, he likes few things, that real old guy in the Hokage office, the colour's black and orange and ramen, we mustn't forget ramen, and I believe he likes something else although I can't seem to recall what th-__**BOOOOOOOOM! **__Oh right, now I remember what that last part was, anyway let us carry on with the story as I pass this onto Naruto Uzumaki._

**THIS IS A LINE**

_2 Years... It has been two years since that fateful night young Naruto constructed that exploding tag and things haven't been the same since, not for Naruto and not for anyone who lived in the Hidden-Leaf-Village. Since that night Naruto has been repeating that "simple" construction for two years and has quickly constructed over hundreds of exploding tags, each one progressively more booming than the rest._

_As for that first exploding tag Naruto made? Well let's just say Naruto has been forever banned from Mr. Hanniki's relaxation parlour for "accidentally" setting said tag off on Mr. Hanniki's back. Thankfully, since it was an exploding tag created by a five year old it really didn't have any kick in besides a slight annoyance and the back portion of his clothes missing._

_Anyway, Naruto's exploding tag's these day's weren't exactly much better than that one, I mean they were better than the one before it, just not by much and Naruto's latest tag could probably only crack an Anbu's mask slightly... those masks are hard as FU*K. Anyway, we find Naruto currently running from a member of Anbu, why that Anbu is chasing Naruto I hear you ask... how am I supposed to know, let's take a closer look and find out._

**THIS IS A LINE**

"Naruto you little twit, you really gone and done it this time" screamed a cat-masked anbu as he shook his left fist threateningly... well as threateningly as a anbu currently chasing after a seven year old with his anbu outfit painted pink with yellow flowers detailing it could be... not really threatening at all really.

Now how did that anbu's outfit end up like that, well it was a complex and tricky little plan set up by none other than young Naruto himself.

**FLASHBACK BULL-JUSTU/ LIKE 10 MINUTES AGO**

_Naruto held some pink paint and a brush as he stood in the anbu's "secret" locker room... "I could get into a lot of trouble for being in here" Naruto mused to himself and then grinned like a Cheshire cat._

"_Let's go wild" and somehow, all of the anbu's outfit's located in that locker room, mysteriously became pink... I wonder how._

**FLASHBACK BULL-JUSTU KAI!**

Now even Naruto couldn't fathom on how he stumbled upon the Anbu's secret locker room, because he in-fact did stumble, just like how he "accidentally" stumbled into a paint show, and he "accidentally" stumbled out with some paint.

Ah! It was one of life's little mysteries.

Anyway, back to the chase, you see Naruto wasn't really looking to get caught on this fine summer's day, so he pulled a magic trick out off his back pocket... and explosive magic trick. Quick as a flash, he turned around mid-run and flung said tag onto the ground.

The trained anbu, seeing said tag immediately halted their chase in worry of the tag, until suddenly is exploded into smoke, hiding Naruto from their vision whilst also masking Naruto's scent, the anbu stood there stunned to their core.

"Since when could Nauto craft smoke-bomb and that's another point, how does Naruto even know what a smoke-bomb is"? the cat masked anbu asked himself in confusion before finally shrugging his shoulders and jumped up onto a roof, returning back to HQ, not before reaching his hand into his kunai/shuriken pouchand heard a SSssss... "Oh fuck m"-boom, one ass-less anbu reporting for duty eh?

**THIS IS A LINE**

From the hidden location Naruto found himself in he could easily see and hear that poor anbu have his ass explode and Naruto himself couldn't care less, it's all fair in love and war. Naruto stood in that hidden location for a few more minutes, making sure there were no other anbu's waiting for him, after confirming that in fact the only anbu waiting, was the one with the hole in his pants and hole in his pride and dignity.

Naruto shook his head in amusement _"wow, I can't believe that actually worked, I mean c'mon, he is an anbu, the elite of the elite and little ol' me managed to blow his bum up... YATTA" _as Naruto thought, his body went on autopilot, straight to the Hokage's tower.

AN:(**PLEASE NOTE THAT NARUTO IS ONLY SEVEN YEARS OF AGE AND THEREFORE DOES NOT KNOW SWEARS... yet)**

**THIS IS A LINE**

"_Ah, smoke-bomb's how I love you, lucky I decided to have a mess about when drawing my usual exploding tag's or I wouldn't have ever found out that special kanji, now only if I could find a way for my explosive tag's to make an even bigger bo- oh! Were already at Jiji's place"_ It was good being Naruto, such little cares about actual life and more worry about bomb's... typical Naruto.

**THIS IS A LINE**

The Third Hokage also known as the Professor, also known as the head Sarutobi, also known as... forget it, I'm sure you get the idea of who he was. Right now the Hokage was dealing with a massive problem to him and his village... paperwork, it's not that the kind-old man hated paperwork, he just didn't want anything to do with it, he didn't want to be in the same room as it, yet here he was, sitting in a room doing paperwork... yea a good **Katon! Goukakyuu no Jutsu! (Fireball justu) **would sort this paperwork problem right out but alas, setting fire to important documents could cause backlash... who knew.

"_I wish, something would happen, so I didn't have to do this bloody paperwork, fuck you Minato, you knew sealing the Kyuubi and dying would get you out of paperwork, fuck you Minato, fuck you" _while the supposed kind old man cussed his successors name straight to the pit's of hell, little Naruto opened the door and walked into the room, startling the Hokage back into the real world.

Naruto grinned up to his grandfather figure and mulled over in his mind on how to ask something, In the end, Naruto decided to forget all tact and blurt out "Jiji, my bomb's aren't making big enough boom's, I want them to make bigger boom's, how do I make them boom bigger"? The Hokage had to give a minute to process what Naruto just said and filter out the actual question out of the ramblings of a seven year old, once he figured out what Naruto had asked, the old man chuckled "Naruto my boy, you already know how to make exploding tag's at age seven I might add and now you wish to know how to make said explosive tag's make bigger explosions" Sarutobi's half question/statement was spoken in a disbelieving and rhetorical way.

Now, Naruto only being seven couldn't tell that the Hokage was being rhetorical, so he simply replied "well duh... and I also can make smoke-bomb seals" Poor Hokage almost fell out of his seat "I'm sorry Naruto I must have misheard you, did you say you made smoke-bomb seals"? Naruto nodded enthusiastically "yea, yea I just used one on cat-san".

The professor sighed "Naruto, I would really appreciate if you didn't go around causing trouble for my anbu". Although Naruto didn't know what appreciate meant he got the gist of what the old man was saying and nodded in acceptance. The Hokage nodded "good, now when did you manage to craft one of these so called smoke-bomb seals"?

"Last night, I was making a boom tag and wasn't really paying attention and when I was finished the tag looked wrong, so I threw it away and then smoke suddenly appeared it was really cool".

The old man chuckled "Naruto, let me tell you something... there is no such thing as smoke-bomb seals, ninja's only use actual smoke bombs, now if what you are implying is true then that means you have just invented a new ninja tool". You could literality see the happiness and shock sprout from Naruto's face.

Now Naruto has never been known for hiding enjoyment and smugness, so it came to no surprise that little Naruto was now running around the Hokage's office screaming his little head off in happiness "I made a new a ninja tool, can you believe it jiji, I actually invented something no one else ever has".

The Hokage has yet to mention that being able to make exploding seal's without even knowing how to pronounce Funijutsu is a masterful accomplishment, no need to increase Naruto's ego now is there?

Anyway, Sarutobi was getting rather annoyed from seeing Naruto swing from the chandelier hanging in the middle of his office and ordered Naruto to get down from there. Naruto complied and released his grasp and plummeted down onto the hard unforgiving floorboards.

"Owwwwwww" mumbled Naruto as he rubbed his bruised nose. Sarutobi could do nothing but shake his head at the young boy's antics.

After Naruto removed the pain, he jumped in the air and shouted " JIJI, HELP ME MAKE BIGGER BOOMS". The Hokage mulled over this in his head quite thoroughly before gaining a pensive look "Naruto, If I were to help you created bigger explosions, what would you try to accomplish with said explosions"?

That single simple question stumped little Naruto so much that he actually had to sit on the floor, crossed-legged and think on it _"What would I actually do with better exploding tag's, what could I do?... I could take revenge on all those mean people who hurt me... I could pull some awesome pranks... no I don't want to cause harm to anyone in the village even if they deserve it, I want to protect everyone who is precious to me, Ayame-chan, Techu-san, jiji and anyone else I make friends with, I want to protect them all... no matter the cost" _Naruto opened his eyes and gazed up into the Hokage's eyes not once losing his foxy grin "Jiji, I know what I would do with that help" Sarutobi tilted his head as in a way for Naruto to continue "I- I would use that help to protect all my precious people, NO MATTER THE COST" as Naruto pumped his fist into the air as if saying to Kami itself that it could do nothing to change his ideals.

To say the Hokage was shocked would have been a massive understatement because he was not shocked, he was floored. This child had actually found it, Naruto Uzumaki had found his **WILL OF FIRE **all by himself with just a simple question.

**THIS IS A LINE**

Laughter ran throughout the Hokage building as Naruto clutched the scroll containing even more information on how to improve exploding tag's and even some secret seal's courtesy of that crafty old man the Hokage. "Now Naruto I don't want to hear from anyone how you have been abusing this gift I have given you, do you understand"? Naruto quickly stood still, scroll tucked under his right and nodded, a grim expression planted upon his face.

"Understood Jiji... can I go now"? Sarutobi could see that Naruto was starting to become anxious so he nodded and gestured to the door with his right arm. "Fuck yea" stated Naruto with a grin, causing the Professor's eyebrows to shoot of his head "NARUTO UZUMAKI, GET BACK RIGHT NOW" It was as if Naruto used **Hirashin-no-jutsu **he was in the middle of the office quicker than the old man could finish shouting.

"Naruto where did you learn that disgusting language"? Demanded the aged man with a frown on his face, now Naruto had no idea what was wrong, he didn't know what the word meant, he just heard it once from an anbu wearing a dog-mask or "dog-san" as Naruto graciously calls him "err I-I le-learned it from D-Dog-san" you could literally see the Hokage's eyes go red with rage.

"Dog, in my office yesterday" safe to say that dog appeared pretty quickly "mah, mah what seems to be the problem Hokage-sama" Dog asked as he nervously scratched his silver spiky hair. "Dog, were you swearing in front of Naruto"?

"Eh? Naruto-kun did you grass on me"? Asked Dog rather too innocently _"Oh fuck, err c'mon Naruto think fast... I GOT IT"._

"Look behind you Dog-san" Naruto said, using his best "I'm scared" look, surprisingly Dog looked and saw nothing but a shelf with some books on it and turned around to Naruto only to find smoke where Naruto once stood.

Dog was sweating rather heavily under his mask now "Ahem... Don't know where he learned that".

"Kakashi-san, I think we need to have a word" Sarutobi stated as the now revealed Kakashi slumped down onto the ground in fear of the old man's rage.

That night, anyone who was still awake would hear a grown man scream rather too high-pitched in fear.

**THIS IS A LINE**

That night Naruto sat in his own apartment given to him by the top-dog himself and opened that scroll, and let his eyes wonder all over the paper and couldn't help but grin.

"YES PICTURES, I CAN ACTUALLY USE THIS"  
Because Naruto still couldn't read kanji to save his life.

**THIS IS A LINE**

**Cut, that's a wrap, put it in the can and give it to all the cinema's... what? You can't watched text?... well FUCK YOU MAN.**

**Ahem anyway that was chapter 2, I would just like to thank everyone who reviewed chapter one by listing their names:**

**Iron Reprieve  
mecrazyfang  
Camn**

**Thank you so much for reviewing and hopefully that chapter's length will make up for the disgustingly short prologue.**

**This is IEvolution360I B.I.T.C.H.E.S  
signing off... CYA.**


	3. Chapter 3: Flashbacks AHOY

**Explosions Are Friends, Well Naruto Uzumaki Thinks So **

"I'm speaking"- Speech  
**"Demon's speaking, justu names"  
**_"I'm thinking"- thinking  
__**"I'm a thinking demon, I'm thinking my justu"- Demon thoughts and justu's being thought of.  
**_Flashbacks will be done in normal writing.  
**Oh and now that I think about it, could anyone with drawing skill please consider drawing some sort of fan art for this story so I can use it for the image whatcha-mi-call-it, if ya can please pm me and I'll give ye me e-mail address so ye can send it, now no one actually has to do this, but it would make me feel all warm and fuzzy. **

_**Oh yea, there's a disclaimer, it's called common fucking sense, I rest my case.**_

**Chapter 2: Flashbacks AHOY.**

**Previously on Explosions are friends**

"_Really, you're back, I don't believe it. Anyway, enough dilly-dallying, It's been a while, I mean it's been one year since we've checked on young Naruto however I'm sure you're all just wondering what happened last time we checked on Naruto and well... He continued making explosive tag's without being able to even read and he even managed to convince the third Hokage to give him a book about seals, luckily one with many pictures and barley any writing, so anyway I'm sure your all anxious to meet Naruto once again so I won't keep you, let's go find Naruto"_

**THIS IS A LINE**

Naruto Uzumaki, now aged at eight years old was very happy, scratch that he was freaking ecstatic and for many reasons.

Reason one; after the Hokage passed on the book containing seals to Naruto, Naruto himself hasn't spent a single day not looking through the book, to Naruto the book was special, not only was it helping Naruto understand how to create bigger booms it also was giving him subtle hints into other seals. It wasn't just that though, to him the book was one of the few ever gifts that were given to him, in fact it may actually be the only real gift he ever received and Naruto couldn't be happier about that simple fact.

Someone actually cared for him.

Reason two; his explosive tags had become quite a something, no longer did the explosions have just enough **bang **to crack a anbu's mask, now they could actually do real damage, as in actually bleeding damage and that fact terrified Naruto but also made him feel excited as to what he do with such bigger explosions.

Reason three; Naruto hated to admit but he actually had less then no friends, he was practically the **FUCKING **dirt the bastard villagers walked on and although Naruto didn't let it show, it actually really hurt him inside, so what was Naruto to think when he actually managed to gain a friend, well that's simple really, he couldn't think, his thought process had completely shut down.

The friend's identity you wish to know it seems, very well Naruto's only friend was a girl and he assumed she was his friend, he hadn't actually talked to her since the incident. Just one year older then the troublesome prankster himself was Tenten, no last name apparently which Naruto thought was complete bullshit, I mean, he's an orphan and yet he has a last name.

Anyway, Naruto met Tenten exactly one year ago in a weapon shop (who wudda guessed) and well let's just say it wasn't exactly an extremely pleasant memory.

"_**TIME FOR A FLASHBACK KIDDIE'S"  
EXACTLY ONE YEAR AGO, IN THE METAL MAN'S SMITHY **_

A seven year old Naruto was bored and as everyone knows a bored seven year old Naruto was never good, especially counting the fact that Naruto could make explosive tags, in fact that seemed to add to dread of the village when Naruto became bored. Who knew?

Now why was Naruto bored? Well you see the reason for his boredom was because he felt that he needed to take a break from seal making and just walk around and enjoy fresh air, although that became quite hard with all the glares thrown from every single-fucking direction, how that's possible Naruto would never know.

Naruto was just about to venture back to his apartment and carry on making seals when something caught his interest, a store, not just a store a smithy, a smithy which didn't look too good, in fact the "METAL MAN'S SMITHY" as Naruto realised just what the sign said looked like it was its last legs.

Naruto's curiously got the better of him and before he knew it, he was just opening the rusty old door to enter the establishment, inside was what Naruto expected, not much better than the outside and boy was that the truth. The first thing Naruto noticed was the assortment and arsenal of weapons which were on show, everything ranging from shuriken and kunai, to katana and war-hammer, all these amazing looking weapons looked they have never been lifted of the stands where they stood.

This fact confused the hell out of Naruto, these weapons looked good, great if he really felt like he needed to add to his confusion.

**CRASH** Naruto was at the centre of the noise in the shop quicker then he thought he could move and what he saw made him realise why no one bought from this shop.

There was a drunken burly man carrying a war hammer which he obviously picked up randomly of the shelf and was swinging it without a care in the world however Naruto saw that he wasn't swinging the hammer without a care, instead the drunkard was swinging it closely at a young girl who couldn't have been more than a year older then young Naruto himself.

When Naruto saw the man swing it closely, it was too close it Naruto's eyes and before he even knew what he was doing, Naruto had grabbed a paper seal out of his right pocket and threw it at the drunken fool. The Uzumaki heir quickly held his two fore-fingers on his right hand up towards his forehead and closed his eyes in concentration and suddenly smoke filled the room, smoke Naruto used as cover as he clumsily sneaked over to the young girl and helped her hide away from the raging drunkard, behind the registers desk.

Naruto held his fist finger against the young girl's mouth when she looked like she was going to talk, the girl looked confused before Naruto motioned towards the drunk, who was now swatting the smoke away and screaming in rage as in how the smoke appeared.

Naruto noticed the man had almost cleared the room of the smoke and sighed, turning back towards the young girl Naruto whispered "stay here, I'm gonna' deal with big and stupid over there".

"But...

"Hush, don't worry, I'll be fine, just stay hidden" the girl looked like she was about to object but then the two pre-teens heard the man growl.

The kids turned their heads to see Mr. Brutish giving the best glare a drunk could give.

Not a very good one apparently because Naruto simply looked back at the man with disinterested eyes and as discreetly as a seven year old could pull his hand out of his left pocket, holding many paper seals, but these seals weren't going to blind him temporarily, no these were going to put this stupid drunk in the hospital.

"Hey, you big dumb ape, why don't you pick on someone your own size"

"What, like you, you little fuckin' brat, what are you gonna' do"?

This reply seemed to have annoyed the young jinchuuriki and without warning the young boy flung all of the seals in his hands, which turned out to be quite a few at the intending target, at least five stuck to the drunk's body and before the man had any time to realise what was happening, the young boy shouted "_Heiwa_" (Translation: peace) and then the seals exploded, creating a shroud of dust which obstructed the man from the view of the kids.

As the dust settled Naruto gulped _"Oh crap, what have I done? Is he dead?" _as the boy panicked the dust finally settled and what greeted the two pre-teens caused them to sigh in relief and Naruto to chuckle slightly.

The drunken man was on the floor unconscious, with all of his clothes blown off except for his boxers and this sight made Naruto sigh even more in relief _"thank Kami, I thought I threw my more recent exploding tags for a second there... I don't think he would have just gotten away with a few burns and no clothes if I used them"._

"Tha-thank you" spoke a small unsure voice. Naruto turned to the voice and found out it was the young girl he had saved, she looked unique Naruto thought, her hair was black which was styled into two Chinese style buns on either side of her head with short bangs of hair falling over her forehead, her eyes were black in colour and slightly big almost as if she was in awe or something similar, her clothes were really something, Chinese style pink blouse with dark blue pants.

To Naruto who had never seen Chinese style clothes before, he thought they were pretty cool, nothing compared to orange but then again his fashion with orange was slightly biased as it was the coloured clothes he could afford because everything else was to dear _"20,000 yen for a pair of black pants FUCK OFF". _

Naruto now seemed to realise that the young girl had said something, the young boy smiled and said softly "no problem, glad to have helped" this seemed to improve the girls mood as she stood up to her full height, a bit taller than Naruto actually which gave him so much grief _"Can I ever be taller than someone?"_

"What's your name?"

"I'm Te-Tenten... what's yours?"

"Me, I'm Naruto Uzumaki the Demolition Expert, although I still don't know what that actually means" this made the now discovered Tenten giggle at his antics, Tenten opened her mouth as if she was going to say something else before something interrupted her.

"TEN-CHAN I'M HOME" shouted a voice from the front door.

"I'M IN THE BACK" shouted Tenten to alert her dad as to her location, as her father was coming from the front, Tenten turned to talk to Naruto again but found he was no longer there "wha..."

"TENTEN ARE YOU OKAY?" screamed her dad as he saw the burly drunk unconscious on the shops floor with Tenten only a few feet away from the man.

Little did they know that a young boy walked out the back exit but not without taking the unconscious man's wallet what, he deserved this, didn't he?

_**END OF THE FLASHBACK PEOPLE  
BACK IN PRESENT TIME**_

Since that very day Naruto noticed Tenten more and more and each time he saw her he hid himself out of fear of her or her dad knowing about him, the villagers he could accept but Tenten calling him a monster, demon or whatever the hell the villagers think of these days and it killed Naruto inside but he figured it was for the best.

Anyway that day wasn't so bad, the man's wallet contained quite a bit of money and Naruto spent that money on important things.

First he bought five brushes, each of different sizes and lengths along with 2 tubs of black paint because his previous equipment he used to make seals was more than fucked, his old brush didn't even have any tip on it, how that happened Naruto will never know. Naruto also bought a couple of cubic-fuck-loads of paper; he was running low on it, not any more apparently.

Next Naruto bought all the essential living requirements which consisted of ramen, milk, ramen, orange-juice, ramen... oh and ramen couldn't forget that. At this point Naruto's hard earned money was starting to become non-existent but before he had no money left Naruto quickly ran towards the cheapest clothes shop he knew of and continued to buy some essential clothes, such as 2 pairs of baggy pants in the darkest shade of orange available, which was actually pretty dark along with 2 red long sleeve tops with said sleeves white in colour.

After buying all those things Naruto was out of luck with money and that worried Naruto, but apparently the worry was unneeded because the Hokage told Naruto that he was going to enrol the young boy into the ninja academy today.

And that's why we find Naruto walking up a path which led into the academy grounds grinning like a loon Naruto looked up towards the hokage monument, more specifically the fourth hokage's head and held his hand up towards it "I'm gonna become the best ninja in the world" with those words Naruto walked into school intent on becoming the best.

"You better fucking believe it"

**CUT, that a wrap**

**Again ship it to all the cinema's all over the world, what, still can't watch text, well my good man I have a two things to say to you fist word FUCK, second word YOU!.**

**This has been IEvolution3601 B.I.T.C.H.E.S  
Signing off.**


	4. Chapter 4: A Taste Of School

**Explosions Are Friends, Well Naruto Uzumaki Thinks So **

"I'm speaking"- Speech  
**"Demon's speaking, justu names"  
**_"I'm thinking"- thinking  
__**"I'm a thinking demon, I'm thinking my justu"- Demon thoughts and justu's being thought of.  
**_Flashbacks will be done in normal writing.

**Disclaimer? Bah, I got two words for you, first word FUCK, second word YOU. (I rest my case)**

**A/N: I would like to thank all of you people who read and follow this story, I would also like to especially thank all those who review, I appreciate all of the criticism, I ignore any flames I might get and feel grateful for any positive comments, so thank you. I would also like to point out that I am in no way trying to be a professional writer so if someone uses professional terms or something in a review I will not understand them, so without further notice, here's chapter 3.**

**Chapter 3: A Taste of School!  
**_**Previously on Explosions Are Friends:**_

"_Back again... You're joking right? You must of miss-clicked or something... bah whatever. Anyway Last time we saw Naruto he had just started the ninja academy after remembering a story about how he met a young girl named Tenten, now at age 9 he has just finished his last day of year one, so without any more talking I present to you... Naruto"_

**THIS IS A LINE**

"Alright kids, over the holiday I wish for all of you to expand you're learning from everything we have taught you here at the academy, when all of you come back, you will be taught by a new teacher, it's his first year next term and I expect great behaviour from all of you... especially you Naruto".

"HEY"

"Anyway, since there is only 10 minutes left until end of class, I suppose it's suitable to allow you all too just relax and chill till the end... it has been fun teaching all of you the history of our grand village and even sneaking in a few basic fighting stances. Good-bye my students, this was, as you all knew my last year working. So I must say it's been fun" and at those ending words Konamu Akira walked out of his class to return home and live out his remaining years.

**THIS IS A LINE**

"Bye sensei Konamu" muttered a spiky blond haired child as he read through his book.

It had been slightly difficult being Naruto through his first year at the academy not because of his less than stellar grades or for the fact he ignored most lessons in favour of reading the book Jiji gave him, he still hadn't managed to finish it even with the fact that Naruto received reading lessons from sensei Konamu.

Anyway, the main reason the first year was difficult was because of the bullies, on the first day of school Naruto stated in front of the whole class that he was going to become Hokage and when the first who disagreed voiced his opposition towards that idea, others followed and soon quite a few kids in his class gave him the nickname "Wanna-be" which ticked of Naruto to no end but alas Naruto had agreed to not use any explosive tag whilst in school grounds and couldn't teach the punks a lesson.

And that's another thing that he had to think on, the teachers had recently started light sparring matches between students so they could get a feel of Taijustu, it was fun it really was however Naruto felt that the basic fighting style the teachers taught the students didn't fit him, it wasn't that it's bad or anything . Naruto just didn't feel right when he used it; it just felt slow and thuggish, which Naruto detested.

"_Ah, those thoughts are really for a later time, likely when I'm older, probably in the last year of ninja academy; anyway I suppose school isn't all that bad, there's quite a few... unique kids in my class" _mused Naruto as his eye's wondered across the class-room, as usual he saw all the usual groups of kids, there were the bullies, bunch of big-headed morons who used number to intimidate fellow learners into giving up their lunch money. You know the usual.

Next up on Naruto's little eye adventure was the group of deep annoyance as Naruto titled them. It wasn't because of any sort of fashion and attitude the group; it was because it was the sasuke fan-club which consisted of practically every girl in the class except for one.

Thinking of the little brooder, he was located in his seat next to the window by himself. Sasuke Uchiha, the last of his clan. From Naruto's understanding, the perpetrator of this heinous act was none other Sasuke's older brother Itachi Uchiha and it was at moments like that which makes Naruto glad he himself didn't have any relatives. And because of this act Sasuke had become some sort of creature which could kill any form of happiness by simply being in the area. It was that bad.

Next was Sakura Haruno who was a fan-girl which makes her a sub-human, not worth actual thought over.

Ino yamanaka, who also happened to be a fan-girl. Enough said.

Kiba Inuzuka was a kid who had a ninja hound partner called Akamaru and when I say hound, I really mean bundle of fur which poses no threat to anything ever.

Choji Akimichi was a alright kid, didn't talk much not because of being shy or anything, it was because talking meant he wouldn't be able to eat and Choji loved eating, so you can probably see the problem there.

Shikamaru Nara was a lazy person plain and simple, sleeping was the best thing in the world according to him.

Hinata Hyuga was a extremely shy girl and if Naruto hadn't had had those private lessons with sensei Konamu Naruto wouldn't have been able to tell why Hinata was always shy.

Shino Aburame likes bugs. That's it, really that just it.

Those people were the only unique students in the class by Naruto's standards.

"_Well, that's a lie... I mean there's me as well" _a chuckling Naruto thought.

Naruto looked towards a big clock located upon the front wall and. It had been 8 minutes since Konamu had left the room according to the time telling device.

"_What to do, what to d... oh! I know, I think I brought it this morning" _these thoughts referred towards the stack of paper, one brush and one small jug filled with black paint.

Naruto popped the lid of the jug and dipped his brush inside, covering the brush in paint, after that he set towards simply stroking the brush across the page randomly.

By now the whole class had stopped there doings to watch Naruto seemingly concentrate hard at stroking his brush across the paper... however that was far from what Naruto was actually doing.

"_I wonder if I move the brush to the left a bit more, if it would cause a bigger explosion, if I tried it and the tag became unstable it could blow up the entire classroom... ah bugger it let's give it a go" _and so Naruto then went onto what he thought in bated breath. The seal on the paper started glowing, slightly worrying the other students, however Naruto didn't either care or didn't notice and kept his eyes firmly upon the seal he had just painted.

After a few excruciating seconds, the seal stopped glowing and returned to its dull black colour. Seeing this Naruto reached into his pocket and pulled out an explosive tag he made the other day and compared, he held both tags next to each other, his eyes scanning each of them looking for every separate detail. After a few more minutes the academy bell ringed and all other students left, but not Naruto, he wasn't going anywhere just yet.

Minutes passed and Naruto still sat in his seat just looking at the tags he had created and soon his eyes practically glowed in excitement. Naruto would defiantly make more of these new "special" tags and with that Naruto stood from his seat and looked around the room.

"Where the bloody hell did everyone go!"

**THIS IS A LINE**

Naruto now sat on his bed seemingly looking at nothing; however Naruto was pondering upon something very serious _"I wonder if I can make a tag that can summon ramen to me?"_

Very serious indeed.

After a while Naruto must have just given up thinking about the ramen tag and shrugged his shoulders before swiftly undressing, throwing his white/orange long-sleeved shirt and dark orange baggy pants onto a nearby chair. Practically throwing himself into his pj's as if someone was going to see him naked and promptly collapsed onto his bed into a blissful sleep.

**THIS IS A LINE**

At the hokage's office

As usual the professor was seated in his chair looking at paperwork whilst grumbling " one of these day's I'm going to go screw it, flip off the paperwork before finding each and every person who has ever given me paperwork and rudely give them the bird as well".

"Mah, mah Hokage-samma that's rather undignified if I may say so" spoke a silver-haired anbu which had just stepped into the old man's office.

"Heh, you are right Kakashi, all this paperwork is making lose my mind" the Hokage replied before placing both of his clasped hands underneath his chin in a thoughtful position and sighed "Kakashi, you are not going to like this but you are the only one capable of completing this mission".

Sarutobi's voice was grave and serious which Kakashi immediately took notice of "Hokage-samma I am happy to do any mission you may give me, do not feel as if you have to ask for my permission for you to give me a mission, I will do it gladly" a hidden smirk made its way onto the Hokage's face.

"I'm glad to hear that, so you will have problems with being demoted to Jounin and having to take a genin team this year, no problems at all right?... that's good to hear I expect you be ready for this assignment A.S.A.P, dismissed". The look on the ex-anbus face mask-and-all was absolutely priceless which almost made the Hokage fall out of his chair in a fit of laughter.

Only one thing was going though Kakashi Hakate's mind and that was;

"_Me and my big mouth"_

**END  
Omake: Naruto's dream.**

It was a war, one side Vs the other, one side was however losing rather badly and needed desperate help.

"Can someone save us?"

Nothing happened.

"Ahem, I said can anyone save us?"

Whispering could be heard "dude, that's your cue"

"Is it, I thought, where that hunk of a man was my cue?"

"No, that's the cue for something more private; now get your ass out there"

Rustling could be heard as well as screams of "ah get of me you fricken' retard" or "I'm going, I'm going"

"Yee-haw, here comes a ass-kicking" and ta-da Naruto appeared dramatically dressed in kage robes.

"Ah Hokage-samma, please help"

"Save us sir"

"Have my babies"... that last comment scared Naruto slightly.

Naruto looked towards the enemy that his side was facing and grinned sadistically "HEY FUCKERS PREPARE YOUR ASSES FOR A KICKING" and then Naruto disappeared and reappeared having literally kicked each of their asses.

"Yea I'm the best".

END DREAM

Naruto woke up in his bed and groaned upon realisation that the it was all a dream.

"Fucking stupid omake"

**Cut that's another wrap **

**I don't know why but I feel that this chapter was lacking for some reason and I will most likely change it later, however that was chapter 3 (don't count prologue as a chapter) of Explosion's are friends, I hope you enjoyed.**

**Again I am sorry if this chapter seems like it's lacking, I really don't know why.**

**This is IEvolution360I Signing off  
Smell ya laterz. **


	5. Chapter 5: Secret Revealed!

**Explosions Are Friends, Well Naruto Uzumaki Thinks So **

"I'm speaking"- Speech  
**"Demon's speaking, justu names"  
**_"I'm thinking"- thinking  
__**"I'm a thinking demon, I'm thinking my justu"- Demon thoughts and justu's being thought of.  
**_Flashbacks will be done in normal writing.

Disclaimer (Do I have to say this again? me no own Naruto ya daft git).

A.N: Very sorry for this being late, ya know how life is... one day it's all good, the next a huge fecking horse runs into you, so fun times eh?

**Chapter 4: That doesn't Look Stable!**

"_So were here again huh? One day you're gonna' realise that reading this is stupid but ah well what can ye do... so last time we saw Naruto he had just finished his first year of ninja academy and that was what, three years ago? Yes three years ago and now it's actually Naruto's last year... isn't this so exciting, anyway we find Naruto in the ninja academy grounds moping, seated on that old swing Naruto loves so much"_

**THIS IS A LINE**

Naruto was sad, scratch that he was bloody depressed, why you ask? Well you see today was the Genin exams and Naruto should have passed, Naruto performed wonderfully, but alas the last part was to created two clones of himself and the reason escapes Naruto's brain but he just couldn't create one, never mind two without them looking like they were just put through a blender.

The fact Naruto didn't pass was so unfair, Naruto even took on a extra test revolving around his fuinjustu, Naruto still didn't have a clue what that even meant but he had to create some explosive tags and activate them, thankfully they went outside for this part of the test because otherwise there would be no more school after the tags finished with it.

Hell he even did well at Taijustu even if the academy style feels so wrong to Naruto, he still managed to use it adequately, but even after all that his clones were nowhere near good enough for a "barely pass", never mind a "pass".

Naruto just couldn't accept that he failed but he just did and there was nothing he could do to stop that.

"Crap, still can't believe it... ah, I might as well go home and just see if falling from my window will kill me" Naruto muttered to himself as he jumped of the swing seat and bounded upon the roof of the nearest building, heading his way home, but unknown to Naruto a certain Chuunin academy teacher was watching him go with a sadistic grin placed upon his face.

**THIS IS A LINE**

"_Hmmm, seems like I won't be going home for some time, if the amount of drunk angry villagers camped outside my door tells me anything" _Naruto thought to himself as he changed his destination to a nearby ledge overlooking a large part of the village.

Naruto didn't know how long he was sat there all he knew was that he couldn't go home for a while so he might as well just relax here and contemplate how tall a building needs to be for a chakra-enhanced student to die from the height.

"Hello there Naruto-kun" spoke a sickly-sweet voice belonging to one of Naruto's academy instructor, as for which one it is? Which instructor was the biggest kiss-ass of the two off them, if you're answer was Iruka, you are quite mistaken, no it was Mizuki everyone's favourite teacher... right?

"Oh, Mizuki-sensei, what can I do for ye"? Asked a slightly suspicious Naruto, Naruto never liked Mizuki, for some reason Mizuki always regarded Naruto as some sort of unspoken evil.

"Oh, nothing Naruto-kun, I just came here to tell you that you can't hold blame for Iruka for failing, he was just making sure you wouldn't be un-prepared for the ninja-world and sending you off without being able to create a simple clone is defiantly something you need to know" Mizuki said all that still with his sickly-sweet smile on his face, a sickly-sweet smile which was starting freak the fuck out of Naruto.

Naruto sat in the same place he was at apparently thinking about what Mizuki said. But he wasn't "_Of course I know not to blame Iruka, I'm thinking if this height is enough to kill me, oh that reminds me, _Mizuki-sensei do you know how tall the Hokage building is"? asked a curious Naruto.

Poor Mizuki couldn't help but place a 'WTF' look on his face, however he seemed to recover from the strange question and answered "I'm not sure Naruto-kun, it's the tallest building that's for sure, why did you ask"?

"Oh, no reason"

"Well, ok then, by the way you do know that since you failed this test, you get to try for a special bonus test"

Naruto's head turned to the side so quick, Mizuki almost thought he heard a crack "What do you mean Mizuki-sensei, I failed why would I get a special bonus test"?

"Because Naruto, I went to the Hokage after you're failed attempt and petitioned him to allow you to take this serial task, however you can't tell anyone about this test, its whole idea is that you're supposed to be stealthy and skilful"

"That sounds almost plausible... fine, Mizuki-sensei what is the test"?

If Mizuki was surprised by Naruto's smart word, he didn't show it and then went ahead to explaining the whole idea of what Naruto had to do for the bonus test.

**THIS IS A LINE**

We find Naruto just outside the Hokage tower and Naruto seemed to mulling over something in his mind _"This 'test' is so fake, sneak into the Hokage's secret vault and steal a sacred scroll, yea I'm sure Jiji allowed this... however it's not like I have a choice, if I do this I can prove that I'm a capable ninja and that Mizuki's a traitor so in actual fact I'm doing this village a huge favour... just in a round-a-bout way... should make a medal for me"_

**THIS IS A LINE**

Naruto was lounging about within a opening in dense forestlands, in his lap was a huge scroll, but not just any scroll, it was the forbidden jutsu scroll.

It had been 2 hours since Naruto arrived at the location Mizuki specified, with nothing to do, Naruto opened up the scroll and read from it and the first jutsu was called **KAGE-BUSHIN** one thought ran through Naruto's mind at that point _"Aww, FUCK ME, not a bastard bushin jutsu"_

Anyway that was 2 hours ago and Naruto had succeeded with learning the jutsu, it was easier than expected considering it was a Bushin jutsu, however Naruto took to it like fish to water.

Naruto was really getting bored now, someone should have found him by now but also, no-one had so to pass the time, Naruto once again rolled out the scroll and began to read until he came-upon a line of writing, reading it said "_Theory of Time-Stop Seal"_ now believe it or not, the ability or even the theory of seals that stop time attracted Naruto, as he soaked up all the relevant information, he became engrossed with the theory.

According to the words upon the scroll, the theory to stop time has always been pondered about, however never figured out, that is until seal's came into the equation, apparently, one so entwined with seals could essentially create a seal which in theory could pause time temporally, then it said about some complicated requirements such as the chakra needed was astronomical and most likely jinchuriki's, containg tailed-beasts above six would have enough chakra.

Now, what a Jinchuriki was Naruto didn't know, so he simply decided that since he didn't know what a Jinchuriki is, he didn't have a cat in hell's chance of creating the seal.

Naruto sighed in disappointment "damn-it, that seal could have really been useful, imagine what, time-stop and exploding tags could do together, it's a match made in heaven for sure".

Seeing that there was nothing left for Naruto to read he rolled the scroll back up and hid it behind the tree he was leaning on.

Looking up to the sky Naruto saw nothing but stars and smiled, _"Such a beautiful night sky" _Naruto's smile disappeared from his face _"If only I had someone to share this moment with... life and fate are both cruel bitches that's for sure"._

In a moment of defiance Naruto raised his hand towards the sky and lowered all of his fingers except for his middle one, giving the sky the bird, Naruto at that moment decided something _"If life and fate are against me, I'll just have to get stronger than ever to beat them, Naruto Uzumaki does not give up"._

His pep talk finished Naruto closed his eyes to just relax, just for a moment.

**THIS IS A LINE**

It had been about 20 minutes until Naruto heard something coming towards his position and he couldn't hide his smile when he found it was Iruka. Opening his eyes to address Iruka he said "Iruka-sensei, took ya damn time, I've been here for hours... so I learnt a jutsu, do I pass the exam or what?" questioned Naruto, making Iruka give a confused look towards him.

"_Hmm, a turn out Mizuki was lying after all, but I wonder where he..." _Naruto mind was cut off when he heard a whistling sound coming ever closer towards himself.

Turing his head to the side he saw a huge shuriken practically flying towards him.

Naruto was about to duck down and avoid it all together when suddenly he felt a weight push him back and felt something above him.

Turns out the thing above Naruto was Iruka with windmill shuriken sticking out of his back.

Tears started to stream out of Naruto's eyes, "why" he choked out in sobs. Iruka looked sadly down towards the boy underneath him and smiled "because you're like me" that shocked Naruto and when Iruka carried on, Naruto listened intently.

"When I was you're age, I was the class fool, always making fun of myself to gain attention... everyone laughed at me too... but... but I didn't give up and pushed onwards, just like you do now, so I... I couldn't just let all that come to an end here" Iruka's heart-felt confession was trashed when laugher rang around the clearing in the forest... curtsey of one teme-traitor.

"That's rich Iruka, I know you're lying so why don't you tell him the real reason, you know, the reason that if he dies then Konoha's demonic weapon would die"

"Mizuki, no th... that's forbidden, STOP" Iruka pleaded with his once friend.

"Ha, no chance... Oi Naruto, the reason everyone hates you... why people hurt you is because 12 years ago when the Kyuubi attacked, the fourth Hokage couldn't kill it, instead he sealed it into a new-born baby, wanna' take a guess at who this baby is" the mocking intent in Mizuki's voice made Iruka sick to his heart and as he looked back down at the young boy under him, he became surprised when Naruto looked not scared or traumatised, instead he looked furious and boy was he right.

Naruto after hearing the truth about why he was hated, felt a rage nothing like he felt before wash over him and in a split-second decision Naruto rolled out of Iruka's protection and flung a smoke tag towards the floor in-front of him shielding himself and Iruka form Mizuki's line of sight.

Mizuki cursed as he tried to see though the smoke and grinned when he saw a outline of a boy, reaching for a kunai in his pouch he charged towards the boy, plunging the bade into the body.

Suddenly the smoke cleared and in-front of Mizuki was a smiling Naruto holding up a piece of paper between his fingers.

Mizuki was mentally scratching his head in confusion "why are you smiling demon-spawn?"

That caused Naruto to laugh as he revealed the paper more than before and that's when Mizuki realised he fucked up big time.

"I'm a kage-bushin dumbass... and this here in my hand is a ticket to hell, specially made just for you". Mizuki cried out in worry and tried to pull away from the clone but was too late as Naruto whispered one word.

"_Heiwa_" and the surrounding location exploded into a beautiful sight, taking that Mizuki teme with it.

**THIS IS A LINE**

Naruto watched from a safe location as the explosion died down and sighed, he wished he could have used a bigger explosion but he couldn't risk damaging the village with a bigger boom.

Naruto realised something, he could remember what Mizuki said to the clone and that confused Naruto, he wasn't anywhere near the place where the clone was, so hearing it was out of the question... he'd have to check something later but right now more pressing matters were occurring.

Naruto looked over to the shocked teacher and couldn't help but chuckle.

"Naruto come over here would you" asked the injured instructor, Naruto did as asked and ventured closer to his sensei and felt confused when he was told to close his eyes but complied anway and when he felt something being wrapped around his forehead he gasped as his now opened eyes looked at Iruka's bare forehead.

Naruto couldn't believe it, despite the shocking news, he was happy, happy that at least someone cared for him and he would do anything to protect those who are precious to him.

Naruto smiled, tears running down his face. Despite all the shit that had happened today, he was happy and nothing could change that.

"Demon sealed into me? I'll sort that later"

**The End  
Brap-fucking rap, it's here and done, hope ya enjoy it.**

**As I said at the start I have no excuse other than that fucking horse was huge.**

**IEvolution360I B.I.T.C.H.E.S signing off.**


	6. Chapter 6: Time To Show What I Got!

**Explosions Are Friends, Well Naruto Uzumaki Thinks So **

"I'm speaking"- Speech  
**"Demon's speaking, justu names"  
**_"I'm thinking"- thinking  
__**"I'm a thinking demon, I'm thinking my justu"- Demon thoughts and justu's being thought of.  
**_Flashbacks will be done in normal writing.  
Sooooo, ummm, yea I might be a tad bit late to update but you know how it is, procrastination is my favourite word after sleeping, so I guess you see my point in this if not... then shit I better start running then shouldn't I?_  
Oh yea by the way, I decided to start a new story based upon the visual novel/game Zero escape: Virtue's Last Reward titled; Zero Escape Eh? If you're a fan of 999 (9 hours, 9 persons, 9 doors) then you'd liked this story considering it's the sequel._

Disclaimer (Do I have to say this again? me no own Naruto ya daft git).

**Chapter 5: Time To Show What I Got!**

"_Here again it seems, sigh, I guess it can't be helped, maybe it's fate I have to do this or it's the fact I could be considered clinically insane... I think it's the first reason, anyway onto Naruto, last time we saw him was when Mizuki revealed to Naruto his burden, Naruto took it as well as can be expected and was then accepted as a fully fledged ninja courtesy of a injured Iruka who Naruto saved proving his determination to be a ninja and since then it has been a few weeks and let me tell you, Naruto wasn't exactly thrilled with his new ninja life"_

A few weeks ago if you told Naruto that he was gonna' be a fully fledged ninja he would have probably laughed, and now that Naruto was a ninja all he could do was grow frustrated with his teammates. Whoever said that you're teammates are supposed to be a form of second-family was talking right out of his or her ass because Naruto doubted the lord and master brooder Sasuke Uchiha and his pet sheep Sakura Haruno wanted anything to do with Naruto besides belittling him or flat-out abusing him.

However Naruto held out with the help of his sensei, a man named Kakashi Hakate, a jounin whose whole world seemed to assemble around a certain questionable orange book series named Icha Icha.

Anyway that information wasn't relevant right now because it was time for Naruto's debut, you see as the few weeks team seven consisting of leader Kakashi, and his students Uchiha prick, Haruno sheep and Uzumaki awesome Naruto always repeated one line in over his head each time one of his so-called family minus Kakashi insulted, this line was_ "I'll get my chance to show them" _and today was that chance, because today Naruto got his first real mission that didn't revolve around chasing FUCKING cats around the village just so it can escape once again. Today Naruto Uzumaki received a C-rank mission outside of the village.

Right now Naruto was located within his apartment, packing.

"Right, I need that, that and that... I don't need that, defiantly don't need that and... I don't even know what this is... might need it later though so I'll take it" muttered Naruto as he rummaged through his belongings, upon his bed where he was gathering them was these following objects.

A storage scroll which he learned from the book Jiji gave him, the actual book, some food consisting of ramen, ramen and more ramen, multiple explosive tags ranging from Naruto's latest created ones and some of his earlier ones, a paint brush and sealing paper, kunai and ear-buds for an important reason which will most likely be known later.

"Right I think that's everything I need" Naruto said to himself, making one-last check about his equipment, a few minute later Naruto nodded at his selection, placing each of the items on-top of the storage scroll Naruto's fingers adopted the hand-sign and with a spark of chakra, the equipment went up in a puff of white smoke.

Once the smoke cleared only the storage scroll was left on the bed, Naruto smiled at this as he strapped the scroll over his shoulder to fit firmly against his back in a horizontal way. The scroll itself wasn't that big, its length just reached across Naruto's back and its width was about 10cm.

"Right I do believe that's everything I need, now to head to the meeting point on time, which is in" Naruto's eyes bulged "10 minutes... shit" quick as a flash Naruto checked himself to make sure everything was in place, his holsters were there, his dark orange long-sleeved shirt and black cargo pants were there, headband was firmly secured around his forehead, that was everything so Naruto checked his watch and grimaced _"only 6 minutes left, better book it"_ sprinting to his balcony, he leaped from it towards the adjacent roof in the direction of the north gate.

**THIS IS A LINE WITH NINJA'S**

Five minutes later Naruto arrived at the meeting point to see his team and their escorted benefactor, Tazuna a supposed master bridge builder with a drinking problem.

"Hey guys, I'm here" Naruto stated to his team, Kakashi gave a lazy wave as acknowledgment, Sasuke frowned and Sakura didn't even notice him, too busy admiring the great Uchiha.

Naruto scowled and was about to voice his displeasure at their acknowledgments before Kakashi cut him off by saying "alright team, our mission is to guide Tazuna-san back to his village in wave-country, it should take about around a month for this mission to be complete, so I hope you all packed accordingly" however from the looks of it, only Naruto and Sasuke packed accordingly, Sakura had a bag but it didn't look that packed and Kakashi was sneaky so he probably was okay anyway.

"Okay, team let's go, we will set up camp when it goes dark" with those words Naruto took his first step out of Konoha and boy did it feel good.

**THIS IS A LINE WITH NINJA'S**

Team seven had been travelling for about three hours for now, the weather was sunny and warm, as it had been all week and in the middle of the path was a puddle of water, so Naruto found that a tad bit suspicious, so just-in-case Naruto reached his hand into his kunai pouch casually.

As the team walked over the puddle two figures rose from them and before anyone could react the figures wrapped some bladed chains around Kakashi and quickly ripped his apart.

"SENSEI" Sakura cried out in fear, paralysed to the spot.

Sasuke quickly ran towards one of the two figures intent on getting revenge.

Naruto just looked at the scene and soaked it in, panic rose up in his heart, stalling him and that was all one the figures needed, one of two jumped forward towards Naruto, claw-blade heading straight for his head, intent on killing him.

Naruto didn't seem to like that because he quickly pulled up the kunai he had grabbed beforehand and blocked the strike, causing the blades to connect in sparks and a loud noise of metal smacking metal.

Momentarily surprised of the kid, the cloaked figure couldn't react when Naruto flung his clenched fist out, right into the person's face. The punch stunned the man who gave Naruto the time to pull out a smoke tag, flinging it to the ground; the area was shrouded in smoke leaving the masked man even more unable to act.

Naruto now hidden in the smoke quickly ran towards the man's smell, which distinctly smelt of poison, Naruto reached the man and ducked under the sloppy swing of the man's blade, quickly responding with an elbow into his gut causing the man to stagger which Naruto took full use of as he used the kunai he was still holding by stabbing the man in his right knee, a scream tore out through the man's throat as he crumpled to the floor from the pain.

Before the man could gain any form of semblance Naruto grabbed a low-grade explosive tag from his holster and quickly set it upon the man's chest, taking a few steps back Naruto formed the hand-sign and muttered "Hewai" the tag blew up leaving only a heavily bleeding cloaked figure on the floor unconscious.

Naruto grinned knowing the man wasn't dead also because of the fact that he just kicked rouge-ninja ass, damn he felt proud of himself right now and he deserved to be.

Once the smoke cleared, the road was revealed to show the other masked figure to be ties to a tree with Sasuke standing above him proudly... arrogant bastard or what?

However that proud look soon disappeared once he saw Naruto's opponent defeated with a unharmed Naruto located next to the unconscious attacker.

"Good job team, I believe congratulations are in order" spoke a voice from behind the forest line, a few seconds later out popped Kakashi looking rather well for a man who was just ripped apart.

A few minutes later Kakashi had explained that he knew they were there and decided to excuse himself from the battle to see how his team would respond to a situation if he wasn't there... safe to say he was impressed with their display of skill... well Naruto's and Sasuke's display of skill anyway.

"I must say Naruto I am doubly impressed by you, using a smoke tag to blind your enemy and then to use an explosive tag to immobilize the target is quite an ingenious plan indeed, I see now why Hokage-samma gave you that book about seals and such".

"Thanks Kakashi-sensei" Naruto was overly happy from the praise he received, it being the few he had ever gotten from anyway besides jiji.

"Anyway, enough of that I believe our entourage needs to give us a explanation because I'll bet my precious literature that this mission is well above a C-Rank" damn... if Kakashi was that dead set on believing that he was right, then you damn well better believe him, Kakashi never risked his precious books unless he knew nothing would happen to them.

Let's just say Tazuna copped up a pretty sob story as to why he asked for it to be marked as a C-Rank mission.

**THIS IS A LINE WITH NINJA'S**

"Well, considering we've already came this far, I'd find to pretty hard to turn around now, however I will have to ask my students about this whole situation and if even one doesn't like it, we're heading back and leaving you here" Naruo had never heard his sensei's voice be so cold before now and it scared him slightly, reminding him that Kakashi-sensei was the elite of the elite and could be dangerous when needed.

Kakashi looked towards each of his individual students silently asking them if they wished to continue.

Sakura nodded in determination, she wanted to prove herself to Sasuke, she wouldn't be that weak ever again.

Sasuke impassively nodded, he couldn't really care about the whole situation, as long as he had a chance to gain more strength towards his goal.

Naruto looked straight into Kakashi's eyes with raw energy and power, grinning Naruto said four words.

"Why the hell not".

Kakashi nodded, then it was agreed, he turned to look at the bridge-building master and gave a lazy eye-smile "very well Tazuna, it seems we reached the verdict to help you; however I expect an upgrade in pay after the mission is done, understand?" Tazuna couldn't nod his head quickly enough, smiling he could finally save his homeland, however Tazuna blanched when he realised an important fact.

He didn't even have enough money for the C-Rank mission, never mind a B-Rank mission.

**THIS IS A LINE WITH NINJA'S**

After a few more hours team seven set up camp for the evening, Naruto gathered firewood while Sakura gathered water, Sasuke, he just set fire to some wood already there to start the camp-fire, lazy bastard didn't even do it the traditional way, he just used a **Katon** jutsu and that was it, not even the slightest amount of effort.

Whatever, let's get back on track, so they slept through the night until dawn and when dawn arrived, team seven plus Tazuna continued onward towards Wave country.

It only took a couple of hours to reach the coastline to Wave, they just had to cross over the sea in-between, so they hired a boatman to ferry them across to Wave.

Once they reached the land, it didn't take too long for something to happen.

"So, Kakashi-sensei, do you scare away crows"?

"Why would you ask something like th... GET DOWN"

Team seven ducked as Sakura grabbed Tazuna and pulled him down as-well as a massive clever shaped sword flew over them impaling itself into a tree.

A man appeared on-top of the sword, looking so smug it almost hurt.

"Ahh, the dreaded sharingan, user, the copy-cat, the scarecrow, the..."

"Would you just shut-up, we get it, you've heard of Kakashi-sensei" complained Naruto towards the new individual.

Kakashi looked up towards the attacker and groaned.

"What a pleasant surprise... Zabuza Momochi"

_**END  
**__**There we have yet another chapter of goodness, yippee and all that jazz.**_

_**Anyway I don't really have anything to address or say except for the fact that most people seem to want some form of interaction between both Naruto and Deidara, well, it won't happen for a while anyway and I need to get that scene just right for comedic genius, so don't worry if you want to see a seen between them, it will happen, just in time... that's about it so.  
THIS IS IEVOLUTION2330I signing off  
CYA**_


	7. Chapter 7: Zabuza Moo-mochi HA

**Explosions Are Friends, Well Naruto Uzumaki Thinks So**

"I'm speaking"- Speech  
**"Demon's speaking, jutsu names"  
**_"I'm thinking"- thinking  
__**"I'm a thinking demon, I'm thinking my jutsu"- Demon thoughts and jutsu's being thought of.  
**_Flashbacks will be done in normal writing.

_A/N: Just to mention, I have wrote Naruto a lot differently in this chapter, tell me if you like it or not and then I'll go back to the way I depicted him beforehand._

_Time for some review replies!__  
__Malymac__: Thank you for the review, I am glad you think Naruto should have a fighting style revolving around explosives and you aren't the first to say so, so it's pretty obvious I have been pointing towards Naruto having a unique fighting style for a while, what specifically it is though... you'll have to wait and see.  
__The Fox Boss: __thanks for the interesting suggestion for a sword for Naruto, it may be difficult to make a believable scenario where Naruto may get it, however if I can think of... I'll see what I can do.  
__Ultima-owner:__I can neither confirm or deny that possibility, as I said, those two won't meet for a while and when they do I want it to be really funny. _

Disclaimer: uhhh? I don't know Japanese.  
Want to know when the next chapter should be out? Check out my profile every Wednesday for updates.

**CHAPTER 7: Zabuza Moo-Mochi... HA!**

"_Well... right now shit has officially hit the metaphorical fans and blown right through them, causing the shit to hit more metaphorical house-hold objects such as lamps and microwave... AHEM, I seem to be getting off track a little bit, so It seems it's time for the dreaded "Demon of the Mist" to make a terrifying appearance... but how come? Why has this "demon" come? Let's get back to Naruto and find out WHY for ourselves" _

**THIS IS A LINE...MOOO**

Let it be known that Naruto Uzumaki had never really thought about what he would say or think in a life or death moment, however Naruto was sorely disappointed when his brain might as well have thrown it's arms up into the air and shout "I QUIT" because the only thought that was going through Naruto's dusty head was _"Momochi?... Moo-Mochi... HAHAHA... I'm funny"_.

Safe to say Naruto wasn't impressed by himself.

Naruto had been able to create exploding tags that could rival earth Jutsu's with ease, he had braved the harsh world for a Jinchuriki with a smile on his whiskered face. And with all that happening, the only thought going through Naruto's brain... was that his enemy's sir-name was slightly funny.

"_If I get out of this I'm gonna' head butt a really, really hard wall... multiple times"."_

And since when had Naruto sat down on the floor?... _"Oh right, killing intent, yea_ _that would explain that oppressive force over my entire body" _

The only good thing that Naruto could garner from this situation that team seven found themselves in was that Naruto was the closest to standing up.

Although, considering the fact that Sakura was lying on the floor, face-down and Sasuke was attempting to push himself up but was failing spectacularly, Naruto didn't really feel like he had achieved anything.

However as soon as the killing intent had struck them, it had disappeared, courtesy of a certain silver haired team leader, who was now looking worriedly at his students.

"Team, grab Tazuna and run, ran as far and as quick as you can"

"What about you Kakashi-sensei?"

Kakashi "eye-smiled" and spoke softly "I'm going to stall Zabuza so you can all escape, now quickly RUN"

Naruto growled "HELL NO".

Naruto's declaration stunned those around him for a second. Until Naruto continued with his outburst "we're not going to leave our sensei behind, no chance".

Kakashi gaped at that, before he smiled "very well, if you all believe that, then guard Tazuna with your life... while I deal with Momochi".

Team seven's face grew fierce determination as they nodded; they then all created a circle around Tazuna who was obviously... shitting bricks.

"Ah, Kakashi I suppose you all want to die together, is that it? Or should I keep guessing?" Zabuza mocked cold-heartedly. Kakashi's eye's narrowed in anger and he quickly lifted his hitai-ate to reveal his sharingan eye in all of its magnificence.

"You should keep guessing" Kakashi said calmly as he charged forwards, kunai appearing in his hand as if it had always been there, he reached Zabuza in less than a second and aimed to plunge his kunai into Zabuza's head to finish the match quickly and cleanly... too bad Zabuza was ready because he heaved his huge zanbato and blocked the attack, Zabuza clearly having the stronger weapon, easily overpowered Kakashi's kunai and pushed him back, only for Zabuza to then swing his blade in an arc, hoping to catch Kakashi as he stumbled from the push. The blade was about to reach Kakashi, who was still reeling from the push so he couldn't do anything about it.

Right there and then Zabuza would have won, however a certain flying tag came flying towards Zabuza himself. Making a form of growl, Zabuza stopped his attack and jumped away from the tag.

Kakashi had now righted himself and made a silent promise to never push against a zanbato with a kunai... because it probably wasn't the safest thing you could do in the world. Kakashi had also noticed the tag which had now fallen to floor, his eyes widening in shock, he quickly shunshined to avoid any form of damage the tag might cause. Turns out Kakashi was smart to dodge because a second later the tag exploded, a bit too close to Zabuza for his liking.

Kakashi appeared next to his students and looked at Naruto in slight annoyance.

"What? I just saved your ass sensei" Naruto stubbornly spoke before Kakashi could say anything.

"I guess you did Naruto, I thank you, but next time a warning would be most appreciated okay?" Naruto only nodded dumbly, his head down slightly.

Kakashi was about to continue with a compliment but a heavy layer of killer intent had flooded the clearing, turning towards the source he saw a battered and slightly singed Zabuza, who seemed to have not gotten as far away as he had needed. And the reason behind the extra amount of killing intent? Well, Kakashi had no idea behind that although... _"didn't Zabuza have hair before?"_

"Bwahahahahaha!"

That answered Kakashi's question quickly.

Zabuza's rage exploded, this brat was laughing at him... the great "Demon of the Mist". Why, he was goin' to rip that blond kids he... suddenly Zabuza heard something. "Hmmm, what's that noise, it sounds like sizzling?... Oh fuck me" and then Zabuza's ass blew up, spewing up a massive amount of smoke and out of the top... shot Zabuza himself.

All of team seven could only watched; head's bobbed down in embarrassment, except for Naruto who was now laughing even harder.

Kakashi could only shudder as he turned to his blond haired pupil and asked the question that plagued him "Naruto... was that you're doing?"

Naruto only grinned as he cheekily replied "maybe".

"But... ho-how?"

"That's easy... as soon as we left Konoha; I've had at least 50 shadow-clones following us in the surrounding forest, apparently he only 'popped' a few before confronting us, so when that first explosion distracted him another of me threw one on his ass"

"But why his... ass of all things?"

Naruto adopted a thinking pose, his tongue lolling out of his mouth slightly as he thought, finally after a few seconds he opened his mouth to say "because I thought it would be funny"

Kakashi nodded slowly as backed away, towards Zabuza's crashing place.

Sasuke turned towards his blond haired moron of a teammate and asked "you just embarrassed and maybe incapacitated an S-rank rouge ninja, you do realise that... right" Naruto looked towards Sasuke and stared for a few seconds before opening his mouth and the words "what's an S-rank rouge ninja?" escaped from his mouth, then he ran after Kakashi.

Sasuke twitched.

Sakura stared at her life-long crush.

Sasuke twitched twice.

Sakura waved her hand in-front of his face... no response.

Sasuke twitched thrice.

"Sasuke-kun, are you okay?"

Sasuke turned towards the closest tree.

"What, are you-

Sasuke ran into the tree, screaming lunacies, knocking himself out cold.

"SASUKE-KUN!" screamed Sakura as she ran to Sasuke's unconscious form.

Once Sakura reached him, she started cooing soft words into his ear.

Tazuna stared.

Then took a loooooooong drink from his bottle.

He then continued to stare.

Then he spoke.

"I'm so royally fucked"

**THIS IS A LINE... THAT'S ALL**

Kakashi had just reached the location of Zabuza's fall, and was surprised to see the man standing... well "standing" was a strong word; it was more like "desperately hugging a tree to stay upright".

"H-how?" Zabuza moaned out through the pain of his ass exploding.

Kakashi shrugged "To tell you the honest truth, I ain't a fucking clue, Naruto's even crazier than me sometimes... pretty cool really"

"Fu-fuck the le-leaf village ge-genin" Zabuza stated.

Kakashi nodded "yep, I feel like saying that sometimes to tell the truth".

"F-fuck leaf village jonin".

Kakashi tsked "now that's just rude and here I was about to ask you to be my friend".

"F-fuc-"Zabuza wasn't able to finish what would obviously be a polite and kind compliment because two senbon needles had just punctured his neck, causing the man to fall to the floor, hopefully dead.

Before Kakashi could determine what the fuck had just happened, a person who looked like a hunter-nin jumped don from the trees and plucked the needles out of Zabuza's neck. The hunter then turned to Kakashi and said "I must thank you... this rouge has been a thorn in my sides for far too long" the mask upon the hunter-nin's face disturbed Kakashi somewhat, however he wasn't showing this fact.

Kakashi remained aloof, whilst in reality he was ready to act in a nanosecond "no problem, just doing my job and all". The hunter-nin nodded and then shun-shined away, body in hand.

At that moment Naruto came running into the clearing shouting "KAKASHI-SENSEI, ARE YOU ALRIGHT?" Kakashi himself looked towards Naruto and nodded "let's head back Naruto" Naruto nodded and turned around to see his team already behind him.

Kakashi could only stare, in-front of Naruto were Sakura, Sasuke and Tazuna, the only problem with that was that A; Sasuke was unconscious, on-top of Tazuna's shoulder, mumblings something about "S-rank" and "idiots". B; Sakura was glaring daggers at Naruto. C; Naruto seemed to not care in the slightest as he started to chase a butterfly he had spotted. And finally D; Tazuna was drinking... a lot.

Kakashi stared.

And stared.

"_What in the world happened when I was gone"_

He continued to stare until...

Kakashi's eyes twitched.

He twitched twice.

Then his eyes went into the back of his head, causing him to go unconscious, the final thoughts running through Kakashi's shocked mind was _"these kids are gonna' be the death of me"_

**THIS IS A LINE... YA GET IT**

"KAKASHI-SENSEI" screamed Sakura as she saw her teacher fall unconscious.

Meanwhile Naruto had picked up a stick and walked over to Sasuke's limp body, hanging over Tazuna's shoulder.

Sakura checked her sensei's pulse and released a breath of relief when she felt it. "He's just unconscious, most likely caused by some traumatic experience, I wonder wha- NARUTO, stop poking Sasuke-kun with that stick, he's not dead".

Naruto hid said stick behind him and whistled a jaunty toon.

Sakura sighed and rubbed her forehead, to clear away the sweat forming on her brow "we need a place to rest, Sasuke and Kakashi are unconscious" Naruto nodded behind her as he went around her, stick still held firmly in his grasp.

Tazuna chose this moment to speak up and with his drunken working mind, the words "yoush ca' bringsh them bac to m-hiccup- my housh".

Sakura translated the drunken sputtering into actual words and breathed a sigh of relief, turning around back to Kakashi's unconscious body, to inform Naruto that he would have to carry Kakashi, she couldn't help but slap her forehead in annoyance.

"Naruto, you idiot, put that stick down, Kakashi-sensei isn't dead either" Naruto grumbled about having some fun before flinging the stick he held away, into the forest surrounding them.

Rubbing his hands together, he heaved Kakashi onto his shoulders and groaned _"should think about losing some weight sensei" _and he started to drag Kakashi along, following Sakura and Tazuna.

After about 20 minutes of walking through the forest Tazuna turned around and blinked dazedly "where are wesh goin?" he drunkenly sputtered.

Sakura looked towards the drunken man and sighed "Tazuna-san, this is the third time you've asked this, we are heading towards your house, so we can rest and recuperate, so would you please lead the way".

Tazuna nodded and turned around to start walking before he once again turned to face the genin.

"Whosh are yoush kidsh again?"

Sakura sighed; this was going to be a long way to Tazuna's house.

Naruto's eyes began to twitch.

"Urge to kill... rising"

**CHAPTER FINISH... YEEEEEEEEA**

_Well, there you have it, the second chapter in this arc, I hope you enjoyed reading, and I thank you for reading, I know I am very late with this update, but ya know... life is full of many problems that just want to kick in the ass._

_As I said at the start of this chapter, what do you think about Naruto's new personality, it's more goofy and silly, however if people aren't happy with this change, just say so and I'll make it so he isn't so random and silly._

_This is IEvolution2330I signing off._

_CYA._


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